Yellow Fever: The Pros and the Cons

  

Do you find yourself doing double takes at every Asian that walks by. Do you have fantasy relationships to a variety of Kpop or KDrama stars. Do you know all about their personal lives than you do your own?  Do you know what the acronyms AP , AMBW, and AMFW stand for? Was Bruce Lee your first true love crush? Do use the word Oppa on a daily basis. Have you moved to an Asian country to find your true love or are you considering it. Do you find yourself hanging out in Chinatown a lot. Can you catch flies with a pair of chopsticks? Does your heart melt and your knees go weak when a cute Asian guys smile at you?If you answered yes to most of these questions then congrats you have Yellow Fever. This affliction is both a curse and a blessing.

  

Asian men can make great boyfriends. They carry your purse, they are loving and very shy.  They are family orientated and will do anything to preserve the family unit. This means an obsession with work but in their culture bringing money in is the way to show love. Sometimes they can be aloof and never express their feelings. Everything is about face. Western and Eastern thoughts often clash. Our societies are wired differently. This being said if you love Asian men you have to know and respect the difference and not expect them to Asian on the outside and Western on the inside.  Now ABCs, CBCs and BBCs as well as Asian born overseas are a different case. 

Many men and women who admire Asians have preconceived notions and stereotypes about Asians. Yes there are cultural norms that do shape their mindset but remember each person is their own distinct person meaning assholeness knows no color. 

  

I think many people that have Yellow Fever live in a fantasy world. Our expectations are unrealistic. Like my goal of going to South Korea and winning the heart of Rain and being his dog’s mama. Or finding my Asian Prince whose love for me is so great that defies his family and follows his heart. In reality this is a rarity. I have 5 friends that do have successful marriages and relationships with Asian men. Please remember it is not the rule, you might not find your AsianPrince maybe he may come in a different package than what you want.

The biggest con about having yellow fever is that you put blinders on and miss chances of meeting quality men from other races. I think this problem hits close to home. The only men that kickstart my heart are Asians.  Recently I can only look at Chinese men ( I do live here and find their features the most attractive) I have seriously thought what if my soulmate isn’t Asian, will my fetish blind me from finding a loving heart? I am equally attracted feature wise and personality wise to white guys. In fact my first girl crush was  all the members of Duran Duran. I remember seeing that video and thinking thinking they were so cute. Growing up in school I had crushes on white guys. My first Asian crush was Dustin Nyguen. When I first saw him on 21Jump Street,  my jawed dropped. He was the second cutest guy on the show( no one can beat out Johnny Depp)

  

I am at the point now where I pondering. I think I need to look into the heart of a man. Love is colorblind after all. I really have to evaluate is my love of Asian men more harmful to my love life.  Honestly not many Chinese men approach me nor show interest to me. Except on Momo(social dating app) but anything with boobs and a hole would attract them. So am I narking up the wrong tree?

So yeah Asian boys will always make me turn my head but I will be forever alone if so don’t open myself to other options. When I was younger I was more open minded about who I dated.  If you were kind and made me laugh I went out with them. As I grew older I became more selective. Though in my younger years I only dated white men with a sprinkle of Latino and Asian to add flavoring. I only went out with 3 black guys so maybe I need to open myself up to different types of people. 

  

I am not sure if this is a means of me giving up on a dream or what. I know Physical attraction is very important but so is a beautiful heart. Is this a preference or am I in fact a closet racist. These questions weigh heavy on my heart. I have been thinking about it when I speak  to The Brits ( my favorite foreign crew) who all suffer from the same affliction.  They all feel it is a preference only and I am over analyzing this. 

The only difference they can date with more ease than I can. Women though themselves at white guys in China. So in their case Yellow Fever is a Pro not a con. My case though it is hard to date, few men in China find my type of beauty appealing. My AMFW friends also don’t have as many issues with their yellow fever there are Chinese men who love white women. With black women or fat women sometimes it can be a con. It is not impossible nothing is impossible but it is a lot of hardworking and you have to be on the top of your game at every moment.

So for me I don’t know if I will get some bumblebee love or not. What I do know is that I am going to open up my mind and heart and let opportunities come to me. I suggest that to all people that have Yellow Fever don’t limit yourself.  Though if I stay in China the odds of me finding Chinese boyfriend will increase. 

  

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How I Met My Boyfriend

I had many readers ask me me how I met Leon. It wasn’t a chance meeting in the rain. Nor were there violins or birds chirping to signify our love. This is the new millennium not the 1940’s.

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We met through the power of technology. In China, they have some nifty social apps for your phone. I got introduced to Weixin, while I was still in the states. It is a great way to talk to people in China. Just make sure you get the international version(it’s in English) My favorite feature is the shake feature. If you are shaking your phone at the exact same time as someone else you can get their profile information.

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I am honestly on Weixin (wechat) more than I was ever on Facebook. Now that is scary, I didn’t meet my boyfriend on Weixin but I met other men from there. I even had a few dates after that nut ball Jason. Weixin is really more of a social app. I use it to keep in contact with my friends.

So, yes you can get dates from Weixin but I find that people are more interested in friendship on that app. Now let’s move on to Weixin’s evil cousin called Momo. Momo has the reputation of being the hook up app. It is like China’s Gone Wild.

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This is the dating app. Now some men on here have no rules of etiquette. It is like hi you are pretty look at my penis picture. For awhile a few of my friends were having a contest who could collect the most penis photos. In the beginning I only got can you teach me English messages. Then the penis came out!

I never really took Momo seriously. Well it was Momo after all. I did get plenty of dates on a Momo and the guys were actually nice except for one. They were all big men online but in person the total opposites. I definitely will post some of my favorite Momo dates in a separate post. Oh and a Momo has a creepy factor. You can find people based on location. I once had a guy on the street look at me and say , “Momo!” So yeah, I am noticeable on that app.

Well after awhile of dating, I got tired. I wanted a commitment. So I took a breather from Momo. This was when Leon contacted me. I had a post about my dog, he simply stated cute dog. I replied thank you.

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He didn’t have a photo up so, I thought nothing of it. He commented on a few my post. So eventually we started chatting more often. Then we exchanged Weixins and chatted daily online.

Leon is the opposite of Jason, where Jason was ashamed of me Leon was proud of me. Leon wanted to be in an interracial relationship. He is just that type of guy that prefers foreign women.

So as we talked more feelings grew and we knew we had to meet. So Leon came to visit me in Hangzhou. He lives in Wuhan. It isn’t that close, it is about 5 hours by the fast train.

I have to say we were smitten with each other. My dog likes him too. I don’t want everyone to think this is a fairytale ending. It is not, we have a lot of challenges to face. I went to visit him in Wuhan as well. That is another
Blog post.

Any of my readers looking to chat with Chinese men find the apps I mentioned. Just know that Momo no longer has an English version. I use the Chinese version, it is tough but just press buttons until you figure this out. It is good fun. My friend used Momo in America and found Chinese men there and went on a few dates. So I encourage you to use both apps they are loads of fun. You never know where you will find love.

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The Easy Button Doesn’t Exist in China

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I have been on trains before in China and I always kept track of my ticket. However my last trip well, I was careless. At least it broke a writer’s block and I have something useful and informative to post.

I just got back from my vacation. I totally needed some R&R, the summer has been very busy. I went to Wuhan to see my boyfriend( more about that in another post) I was very excited and nervous so when I got my tickets from the ticket window, I slipped them in my passport. Well there was a pushy gentleman behind me and I wanted to get out quickly.

I always put my train tickets in my wallet. I tend boarded the train and used my ticket to Wuhan. 5 hours later I arrived in Wuhan and reunited with my boyfriend. We ate and the I went to my hotel.

I handed the clerk my passport so I could register into the hotel. That is the moment that I believe the chaos began. My boyfriend took me to my room. I was so exhausted that I showered and went straight to bed.

The next morning I decided that , I needed to place my return ticket in my wallet, it was a much safer place. Well much to my amazement , the train ticket was missing. I called my boyfriend and he called the hotel have them check downstairs. There was no ticket. After my Lucky finished work he came to the hotel and the staff looked around again.

Leon called the train station to explain the situation and got the procedures. Guess what it was a lengthy process. There is no such thing as an easy button in Chinese . The Chinese tend to take simple things and make things complicated. It involves bureaucracy and of course a stamp!!!
Step One: Buy a new ticket at the Wuhan train station. They will only print a new ticket if you buy another ticket at full price. Luckily I had a picture of my original ticket( I post my life on social media apps) so I got to keep the same seat. It was a window seat, which are highly coveted in China. Wuhan station could not reimburse my ticket that could only be done in Hangzhou. The new ticket indicated that it was a replacement ticket, Easy button version would be an extra fee for printing up a lost ticket.

Step Two: Find someone wearing a uniform on the train and show them the message that my boyfriend saved on my phone because his silly laowei girlfriend lost her ticket.

Step Three: Find the train boss. In China each train has a manager or 老板. Luckily, the helpful stewardess (is that what they are called on trains?) The boss checked my passport and wrote a receipt and a note and told me to find him 10 minutes before we reached Hangzhou.

Step Four: Search for the train boss. He was in the dining car. He stamped and signed the receipt and took my ticket. He handed me off to someone at Hangzhou train. She also signed the receipt and took me downstairs.

 

 

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Step Five: Go to the ticket window. I can only go to the north ticket window because they are the only ones that deal with foreigners. The line was super long and it was crowded. The line jumpers were in full force today. I thwarted one line jumper from skipping me. I blocked him off. I gave my receipt , passport and ticket to the girl at the ticket counter.

Step Six: Wait for the girl to call her superiors. This had to get explained to someone else over the phone. It took about 10 minutes.

Step Seven: Get my Refund !!!! That was a lot to do for a 300 kuai refund. The girl kept my ticket and the receipts.

The moral of this story, is never never never ever ever lose any kind of ticket in China.